Liber Viridis

(Text of a conversation I had on the train a few days back.)

I wanted to talk to you about guides and guardians in general. Are you all the same order of being?

No. We are many, we are multitudes, we are different one from the other. We are beast and bird, wind and water; beings who resemble men and women and jaguars and crows. We are always with you, always. We are a hair's breadth away at all times.

Remember the other day, when I was asking you why the guides don't step in when people get hurt?

You ask us every day.

Well, yeah, it bothers me. Sorry.

[Image: a man who has suffered an accident whilst mountaineering. He's fallen and is badly hurt. A rescue party stands within eyeshot of him, but they are seperated by a chasm. A bridge has fallen and they can't reach him. The horror of the rescue party, the pain they feel at watching the fallen man suffer, is palpable.]

So, you don't help because you can't reach?

Yes.

[Emotion: a dreadful sorrow eminates from M-L. R-M-L is weeping like a child. The sound is as lovely and inhuman as her laughter.]

* * *

Don't really know what to make of all this. I think I'm supposed to help them bridge that gulf, somehow; they've been going on about getting me to write this book for them and I think that's got something to do with it.

Oh, boy. This is where I start picking up signals from Lemuria on my welding torch, isn't it?

Okay, I've just finished discussing this meditation posture/mantra thing with the spooks. They've been training me in it for a few weeks now; I'd've posted it before, but I wasn't sure I'd got it right.

Stand with your feet very slightly apart, back straight, head and shoulders back a little so as to open your chest.

Place your left hand, palm open, level with the heart and parallel to the breastbone. Your hand should be roughly at a right-angle to your wrist. Make a fist with your right hand and push your knuckles up against your left palm.

Say: I am the rock, I am the ocean. You should say this an odd number of times, preferably at least three times. Take a really nice, deep, diaphragmatic breath each time.

Now swap hands so that your right hand is open and your left makes a fist.

Say: I am the wind, I am the mountain. Again, odd number of times, at least three. You should do both parts of the excercise an equal number of times.

This excercise helps you embrace both force and resistance. You become both the eroding power of wind and water, and the mighty steadfastness of the Earth.

Well 'ard.

Here's a talk I had yesterday. It went really well-- I got this kick-ass visualisation excercise for dealing with unresolved anger. It really works!

I told the entities I was feeling stressed out by small concerns and wanted to elevate my sights. Here's what they said:

You fret yourself over the subject of anger. We shall speak to you of anger. [NB: I hadn't actually realised till then, but they were right-- my stressed feelings were to do with anger. I'd been very carefully blocking that awareness.]

Anger is mighty. It is one of the mighty passions. It drives us to defend ourselvesfrom those who would wrong us. Yet followed blindly, it becomes an idle passion and is the source of much wrong. (At this point my lunch arrived and I got the usual pi-jaw about eating junk food: "Must you eat that? It is not healthful!" *rolls eyes*.)

For in anger lie the seeds of much idle passion. Firstly, the idle passion of vengefulness.

When one is angered, one then seeks redress. But revenge breeds revenge breeds revenge, until all is consumed with revenge. Yet if vengefulness be unsatisfied, thwarted, then the vengeful one may become poisoned with needless rage and pain. It is the vengeful one who suffers then.

Then there is the idle passion of self-anger. If a thief takes something precious, we may be angry with him for robbing us but we may also be angry with ourselves for lacking vigilance. We tell ourselves "Oh, I am careless! I deserve to be robbed!" And so: suffering upon suffering, pain upon pain.

Self-anger breeds only misery. Remedy what may be remedied; the rest, let slip from your hands save as a lesson for the future.

I get what you're saying. I have real problems with anger.

Let us advise you, then, dear one.

When you are angered, see your anger as an ocean-- a dark, crimson ocean wracked with storms. At first you are submerged within it, tossed hither and yon in the deeps. But slowly you begin to rise up through the crimson heat of this turbulent sea. And what should you behold but sunlight, streaming down from above. You rise up through the red waters, your head breaks the surface. Mighty waves crash over you, seeking always to plunge you down once more, yet you are lighter than air and stronger than an armoured warrior. The waves cannot claim you.

You rise higher and higher, until you are floating in the air above the ocean. You look down at it, spread beneath your feet. But you no longer need to fear it; it cannot claim you. You are free to fly. Above you is a beautiful blue sky with white clouds like mountains of snow. You can fly into these clouds, and as you do, they cleanse you of all idle passion, leaving only peace.

Thanks! I'll try that next time I get all honked off at something.

Be at peace [term of mushy endearment removed]. When you are at peace, you can better hear us. We will guide you and aid you; we will take that weight from your heart and place blossoms of light in either palm. Trust in yourself, and in us.

How can I help other people deal with their anger? I see people burdened with rage all the time.

It is not for you to govern the feelings of others. But we see why you would wish to pry their hearts free of the trap that is ire. Fight anger not with anger, but make a gift of your tender passions. If you cannot find words to gentle them, you may, with their invitation, use the passages that you know of. [This is accompanied by an image of emotion and probability strands*.]

Oh, yeah, those things. But I'm no good at using them yet.

Fear not and know trust. Trust yourself, trust us. We are your guides and we shall guide you. We are pleased that you found your way to such a powerful tool. Ask of us, and we shall guide you to your goal. We shall lay your hands on those places where healing is needful as we have done before. [Mushy term of enderement], you doubt. Do not fret yourself over doubt. Here, we shall warm your hands and light your way. [As they say this, my palms grow warm. I think they're tinkering with my palm chakras.]

Be at peace now.



*I've described these elsewhere, but briefly: they are a means by which I can attempt to manipulate future events. I see the event itself as a node of potential in the network of probabilities and influences, and try to use that network to bring the node into actuality. There are also emotion strands, which help me to see how my emotions are influenced by and influencing the situation. I can also see other people, and can, if need be, set up a connection to try and help them. Only trouble is, I'm a bit crap still; I can't always make sense of the images and I can't always see what needs to be done to bring an event about. And I get confused between emotion-strands and event-strands. I'm working on it.

I've been trying to ascertain the names of the guides, but I can't clearly understand them. The 'male' guide, the one that stands behind me when I'm healing, seems to be called Mah Ehl, or Mah Ahy Ehl, something like that (the name may begin with an N rather than an M); the 'female' guide who flies seems to be Rah Mae Ehl. I'm guessing a bit here, because the sounds are unclear and the entities aren't big on spelling. Until I'm a bit more confident that I'm getting the names right, I'm going to go with initials: RML for the 'female' guide, ML for the 'male'.

Anyway, here's a quick chat from a few nights back.

Greetings. It's me.

What would you ask of us?

Explain that thing you were saying just now, about reason and linear thought and their relation to emotion?

You know, as you have read and considered this often, that humans extend their tender passions for one another in a widening circle, radiating outwards like a ripple from a stone.

First one loves oneself, then those who are of one's own flesh and blood, and then one's close friends: one's tribe. The ripples weaken with distance and exhaust themselves. Yet having Reason we canextend that widening circle outwards, ever outwards. We say to ourselves: "If I suffer from such-and-such a disaster, then my neighbour must suffer when a similar disaster befalls him."

Reason is worthy. It is handmaiden to the tender passions, not their enemy. It extends the widening ring of the heart's pure empathy outwards, ever outwards, to embrace the world. It is handmaiden to wisdom, and from wisdom comes good.

Would you characterise Reason as male? Hey, stop laughing!

[RML dances in the air, laughing. She has this amazingly musical, birdlike laugh; doesn't sound human at all. ML guffaws, then leans on his stick, smiling.]

Guys, please! This is important.

Yes, reason is male. And female. And it is neither. Do you not reason? Do you not love reason, and press it into the service of your growing wisdom and all your tender passions? [This is ML speaking; RML is still laughing and doing her air dance.]

[ML, with infinite patience] This you know. You need not question that which you know.

We are here, and you may approach us at any time and ask us anything. But you doubt your knowing, and that is to doubt too much. This is not merely the wise doubt, it is the idle doubt born of fear. Trust that which you know.

I'm always a bit scared you're going to tell me I'm wrong.

We do tell you that you are wrong. We will tell you when you are mistaken, we will find you when you are lost. But you must trust always in yourself. You lay open your integrity to destruction when you doubt everything you know, and at all times.

Be at peace.

'Nother download. Got this about 2:30, 3 am last night...


So. Hi there!

[Greeting]

You have not contacted the channeler we sent you [the word they used was 'sent', but concept that came through was more like 'arranged that you should meet'].

That was a sending?

You know this, do you not?

Now that I think about it....

You must contact her.

What am I going to say though?

You know what you must say.

I've got to tell her about your blog, right?

You must indeed. We wish it to be seen.

Yeah, but what if she thinks it's a bad idea?

Be at peace. Do you not know that this is [concept: right action, dharma, destiny?] It is your will, the will of your truest and highest self. Do not lose your regard for the sensibilities of others, for gentleness is precious to us. Yet do not be ruled by it. Do not let it stay your hand on the tiller; when you should streer this little barque straight and sure into new waters, you circle the coast fearfully.

Be not afraid, but be at peace. You are loved. Your hands toil for us and shall be anointed with sweet oils. The care on your brow is placed there by small and petty things. Raise up your eyes and behold the work that is yours to do.

Uhhhh, guys? This is all getting a bit Messianistic.)

[Laughter]

Do you fear? What is it you fear?

Well, ending up like David Icke, for a start. You've already got me using green ink; if I end up in a turquoise tracksuit you're going to have some explaining to do.

As we say: Be at peace, fear not. Let the small and petty take care of small and petty things.

That sounds judgier than usual.

All life, all knowing, all conscience is dear to us. Yet there are many who lose themselves in petty concerns to the exclusion of the great. This you know. We love them no less, but you must not allow yourself to get lost in those same [image of a builing with many different rooms. Some of the rooms are big, some impossibly small and cramped.]

It is not a matter of blame, or of fault, but minds lost in pettiness and the idle passions have a way of drawing other minds to the same idle passions; yours in particular, for you doubt and question at all times, and when you doubt yourself you look to others for guidance and you ape them. You are lost in the idle passion of selfdoubt.

Btu what about people who never question anything, who are always so sure they're right that they just ride roughshod over everyone else?

We do not say "Banish doubt." Rather we would bid you to taste Doubt as you would taste of strong wine: respectfully and judiciously. For as surely as it widens the eyes and makes the heart swift, too much will dull the wits and make all steps uncertain.

And in this matter your selfdoubt is an idle thing. Here in this green book you only speak; you do no harm by speaking.

But if I screw this up, the people who read it could be misled.

Have you not made quite clear the choice that the reader must make in reading our words? You have made your doubt plain for all to see. We commend your honesty in this. Part of your task is to show your doubt.

You say "I do not truly know who speaks these words, but the words are good. Listen not to the speaker but to the words themselves." This is most needful in our time, for there are many who purport to speak for gods or angels, and who, for the most part, speak only for money-greed or fame-greed.

To be humble in this is a good thing. Yet do not falter! You do no harm here, and may yet do much that is good.

[At this point I start to lose my focus. The 'male' guide strikes the ground with his staff and both guides cry out "HAH!" in a great voice. They do this quite a lot, the yellling HAH thing. At first I thought they were angry and yelling at me, but they swiftly reassured me. It actually a technique for sort of tuning me in, making it easier to hear them. I'm really supposed to join in but... y'know, yelling neigbours, 3am, it's a thing.]

More info. It's a bit me-specific, but I thought I'd post it anyhow. It was mostly dictated whilst travelling on the train into Barcelona. The entities seem to like talking to me while I'm travelling. Also they much prefer to talk to me through the medium of a green gel ink pen. I've explained the cultural significance of green ink to them but they won't budge.

I can't belive I'm sitting on public transport, taking dictation from my imaginary friends spirit guides in frikkin' green ink. Kill me now.

As before, bold text indicates spooky perverts. Regular text is moi.

***

Yo! It's me, MC. Got anything for me today?

"What would you know?"

I dunno. Stuff.

[Silence. Waiting.]

Okay. Uhhh...

Do people have souls? Or are we just meat?

Soul? (NB: The vibe I got here wasn't blank incomprehension. It was more of a raised eyebrow, you-can-do-better-than-that sort of feeling.)

You know! Like, an immortal componant.

You have asked us this. Many times.

Yeah, but I never understand your answers.

You do not wish to understand our answer. You fear it.

I suppose.

If we told you, "Thee is no soul, there is only the flesh, and the death of the flesh..."

Hold that thought, my train's coming. Can you get me a seat? Get me a seat, I want to talk to you and I can't write stood up.

(They got me a seat.)

So, you were saying...

If we were to tell you "There is no life beyond this life; you are only flesh and will perish utterly when your time comes," you would not accept it from us because we are beyond flesh.

If we told you: "Why yes, you have a soul, you are an immortal being made manifest through the flesh," you would not accept that either, for we have offered no proof and you have no faith.

Therefore you would reject any answer that we gave you.

Point. So let me put it another way: Can you give me any proof that we live after our deaths?

You won't like it.

Try me

You have seen ghosts. You know the dead remain. What further proof do you wish?

Well, better ghosts, for a start.

When you consulted with the dead of your mother's family, did they play you false?

No.

And yet when you had the knowledge they gave you, you rejected and concealed it.

I wasn't sure it was right!

Yes, you were. Fear cheats you. You allow it to cheat you, time after time. What is it that you fear?

Being wrong. Telling people something that's not true.

And?

And looking stupid.

You must learn trust. We love you; you are our scribe. We will not allow falsness to come from your lips, or your pen. Do not fear opprobrium, ridicule.

You guys sound like Adam Ant.

[Humerous disapproval]


As we say: You are our scribe, and you must learn to express our teachings fearlessly. We will not lie, or give wrong

(Okay, this is where something peculiar happened. It got harder and harder to write, as if something was trying to take control of the pen. Everything was coming out wrong, I was writing the wrong letters, stuff I didn't intend. Some of the entry is unreadable.)

[illegible; may be 'near'] the blood of the r[illegible] [illegible; may be 'opening'] t[illegible] the words [illegible; may be 'not'] no give [illegible; may be 'renew'] the [word repeated four or five times, may be 'me' or 'no'] [illegible; looks like either 'welcome' or 'recieve'] the [illegible; may be 'bowl' or 'prowl'] the

Didn't get that. Can you give it to me again?

The blood of the lost the blood of the lost the blood of the lost ['lands' or 'lamb'] calls you the blood of the lost land ['is' or 'has'] you blood of the lost

OKAY I WANT MY GUIDES BACK ON THE LINE RIGHT NOW!

We are here.

What the hell was that?

The voice of fear. The voice of your proof.

You're right. I don't like it. Can you, I don't know, call it off or something? It wouldn't give my pen back!

Yes. You will be contacted again, however.

Fair enough, but I'm on the train, remember?

Would you want this to happen in your home?

Well, it didn't feel like it was really bad... just confused and angry. Yeah, I could deal.

As you wish.

Anyway. You were saying?

We will not lie, or give you false things to say.

But I might screw up. I might invent stuff in my own head, and end up putting words in your mouths. How can I be sure I haven't just invented all this?

Have patience. We will find you, we will speak more plainly to you as you know us.

Okay. You guys couldn't maybe oblige with a prediction or something?

You wouldn't put it up on the web log if we did.
We will give you predictions in the future, have no fear. But we must move closer to you, we must touch you and you must learn to trust our voices.

Know patience. Know the peace of knowing that each thing has its time. You try too hard to contain too many things. You load yourself with burden after burden; and when in the course of inevitability you let one of them drop, you fling the whole to the ground, then berate yourself.

Be at peace. Know patience. Carry one burden at a time. You ask too much-- not of us, for we are immortal and beyond such burdens-- but of yourself.

[Image: a folded hand gesture, which I understand to mean that the conversation is over.]



* * *

(Later that same day...)

I'm back.

[I feel, rather than see or hear, a greeting]

So, can I have a job then?

Your job is to teach.

There's a bit of a problem there.

Go to the bookshop, buy such materials as you need. Go there as soon as you have finished your food, which [a feeling of diversion, of moving off track for a second, which I've transcribed as 'by the way'] is not what we recommend for your health.

But I like patas bravas!

You will like feeling healthful more.

Okay. I'll have something green later. About those books.

Buy the books. You will know which ones. We will guide you and give you what you need. Teach. Learn. Show willingness, and be at peace.

[goodbye gesture]

* * *

I did go to the bookshop, but lots of other stuff was happening and I got flustered, started second-guessing everything, lost the mission. I did locate a couple of good books in the end, but they weren't quite what I was after. The entities are really really big on having me teach, but I don't feel ready.

Got a fairly hefty download today. It started off with some rather vague, what's-it-all-about-then type questions on my part. The entities took this as their cue to hand me a sizeable whack of advice and info. Here goes... (entities' words in bold).

"Look not to the guides or gods for fulfillment, for purpose in the world. Rather, look to that which can be experienced directly. The rock, the tree; Love, Justice, Mercy-- these are your touchstones. Live as if you had no other life, and as if death was the end of all things for you. Relish the pleasures that this world offers you; relish also the passion of suffering, for in suffering is knowledge, understanding, compassion. If you live tenderly, touching your fellows' lives with wisdom and kindess, then, dear heart, you will not have to fret yourself about heaven and hell. There is meaning in the moment, our child, our dear one, in the immortal and eternal instant. Have no fear. Love. Live in tender passion. Fret not over vengefulness or envy, for these things are idle passions.

In all things you may turn to us and we will answer. Do not forget this. We are your affectionate friends, behind you and above you, and we will neither abandon nor harm."

Which was nice.

A bit later on, I had an attack of the why-mes. Why pick me to do this, to tell people this stuff? I'm no one. I wear black nail-varnish and can't get a job. Then there's the whole, y'know, gothic thing, which really doesn't say 'New Age Prophet'. And so on. They're used to this, I keep on asking them this stuff. I had a whole big conversation last Sunday where they went into a lot of detail, but it's a bit personal and I'm not ready to share it yet. Here's what they said this time:

"In darkness there is a seduction, there is the lure of mystery. We know this, as you know it. The light you see [presented by other people] is sometimes light as of a candle, a pure source. Other times it is purely the reflection worn by water.

"Beware those who preach Light, as much as you would beware those who preach dark cruelty. For how can you know what lies beneath their raiment? Only by touching them do you know, by observing. Some are good and worthy, and a light shines from within them as well as without. Others will talk of peace and light, but this is how they mask from themselves the harm they do. You know this, but let this re-telling shore up your knowing."

MC: So how do I deal with people like that?

"Withdraw your touch from them. Sheild yourself. Yet do not seek always to unmask, unless your evidence is most damning and the need is very great. For there will be many deceived by outward glitter, and they will not understand. You will earn only their incredulity and their anger. Be tender in this as you would be tender in all things, bide your time and be at peace. Fight by example. Fight by being your own dear self, by the showing patience and wisdom we have seen you show."

MC: I don't feel very patient sometimes.

"We know this. But if you permit yourself to be goaded into a fight, it will be on their terms. Fight as we have said. Show tenderness, show eagerness, show willingness to aid and to teach, show willingness to learn. Let your finer nature be unhindered by fear or vengefulness and it will blaze, it will shine."

MC: Yeah, but what if I come up against some total wanker who goes around claiming to be an ipsisssimusinessness or something and takes advantage of other people's credulity? Can't I slap them down? Just a little?

"Of course you can. And then you will have to live with the consequences of that: for what you do will be reflected back on you undiluted by context. Many are unwise. Be strong. Be wise. Show tender patience, and you will convince far more than with aggression and rage, however justified."

MC: That sucks!

"It is hard, yes."

***

Not really happy with the whole "dear" thing, it's a bit mooshy. But I'm trying to pass this stuff on as accurately as possible, so I can't really leave it out. What the hey. Also, I think they're getting a bit fed up with me asking them stuff when I already know the answer or could work it out for myself if I just thought about it for a while.

Still, there ya go.

This is an exercise the guides taught me for centering myself. It's really helpful when I'm going to be in a social situation and I'm feeling nervous.

Stand up straight with your feet slightly apart. Clasp your hands infront of you, one about the other, with the fingers of each hand curled up inside the fingers of the other. Your hands should look a bit like a yin-yang. Hold your clasped hands level with your belly chakra, and take a few slow, deep breaths, in through your nose and out through your mouth. You should feel better immediately.